Snow White and the Half Gay Prince

This is the thing. It might sound stupid but obviously that is not a major concern of mine. Snow White?
What in the hell is wrong with her? I'm confused. My head hurts.
First of all, why did she even listen to that mean witch? That witch was so sinister. Speaking of sinister, do you know any actual people in real life that are sinister like the witch in Snow White? Someone who walks around with a cape that covers their hair and that sneer a lot? If so, I'd like to see them. I'd like to just stare at them like one might a zoo animal.
Why was Snow White so stupid about her? Or is Snow White just a glutton for punishment? Perhaps she has low self esteem. Just goes to show Snow, nobody is immune to that low sense of self worth. Snow was a pretty girl. She seemed to have it going on. So why did she bite the apple? Did she think the Queen was her friend? That she wanted the best for her? I don't understand. What was she thinking? I mean, Cinderella was forced into labor. Rapunzel was locked away (I think, I don't remember that story all that well) Fiona had a spell cast on her. They were really painted into their circumstances. Snow White chose it.

If that wasn't bad enough she became a virtual slave to those midgets. I don't get that at all. There was that Angry guy and that weird slap Happy one. There was the one who always slept. What was his name? What about Sneezy? He was just gross. The kleenex alone would make me sick. The Grumpy guy? Come on Snow White! Grow a pair! Leave. Stop doing their laundry! And all that annoying singing they did! Like they were in some dwarf cult. It's stupid.
Who else was there? Oh, yes, Doc, I think Greg Brady played him in a play that whacky Brady family threw in the back yard to buy Jan George Glass. No wait, that's not right. I think they did it for Bobby to impress Millicent. No, no, I think it was to make money for a new Kitty Karey doll for Cindy, that whiney little nugget.
Now that I think about it I believe it was actually Sam the Butcher that played Doc? I kind of remember that he ended up with that plum role. I love that they called him by his full God given name, "Sam the butcher." By the way, didn't the Brady clan treat Alice like crap? For realz. Wearing that uniform? Scrubbing that oven? Who was she anyway, Snow White?

Where was I? Oh, yes, so Snow White and her poor decision making processes. Obviously she had some mad skills cleaning, she could have earned some coin without any side jobs, did she really need to care for those seven lazy bastards? (Sorry Mom). And then! To add insult to injury she has to kiss a dead guy. The hits just keep on coming.

What ever happened to her and the Prince? I bet he ran off with that sinister Queen or maybe it was the King...
Not that there's anything wrong with that.