Apparently setting traps for bears was not our smartest of ideas.
That's not why we were in the hospital tonight though. It is a true fact that many vacations, camp sessions and even occasionally a day trip to Hershey Park can include a trip to the emergency room. We have had broken ankles from surfing, strep throat on a holiday, stitches, a few things I am sure I am forgetting and tonight a baseball size bump on Saige's stomach.
So off we go to the Small Town Maine Hospital. Five hours in an emergency room is a long time. Probably about 95 songs on the shuffle if you were measuring by music.
In case this ever happens to you, here are some suggestions of what to do in the emergency room
1. Cash Cab! I am not a big tv watcher. I had never seen this show before. Saige totally turned me onto this show while in the waiting room. It was the most fun! The guy and the people and the cab and the questions! Every time I got an answer correct I would blurt it out to her. Then when I found out I was right I would be like, "Did you hear that? I got that one!" She would look at me with amusement and say very patiently, "I know Mom. I heard you." Sweet kid. Then this old man who was the biggest know it all comes in and totally steals my thunder. He knew all the answers, he informed us that he had a subscription to National Geographic for 15-20 years and he read them from cover to cover. Whatever, bragger.
2.Handstands in the hall way (that's a given). Saige is really good at this game.
3. Ask the woman in the blue jacket incessantly if our turn is soon.
And...well... that's about it.
When Cash Cab ends we are stuck with a cartoon and a long wait. Finally we go in the room. Which is actually just another waiting room. This is where we became punch drunk. The nurse came in and handed Saige a gown, she said without any accent at all, "Now take off your Wooly and I will pull the curtain for pri-va-Cee." I would have to say that I liked this very much. I like the word wooly, I like how she prounced privacy but I would really like to see someone with a stethoscope walk through the door.
In the end we left with no real answers from the doctor, some steroids, antibiotics and a prescription or two. He didn't think it was funny at all when I asked him to throw an extra one of pain killers while he was at it.
On the way home we got lost. Typical, normal, par for the course. Waiting room for five hours, starving, dark, strange place, I go 20 minutes in the wrong direction. Just another day.
When we walked in the door Chase had made plates of food for us and cut it up so we didn't have any work to do. He was so worried about Saige. I am saving this post for him. A little absence made him appreciate us more and I think he was actually a little jealous of our Cash Cab watching, poor sweet angel.
We also watched Twist cut her on hair this morning, collected items for the bear trap, in fact, Kirsten asked the man at the store if he had any bear calling whistles (he didn't think that was funny either), broke two glasses simaltaneously in two different rooms, learned to knit, saw the eagle again, divers rock, heard the worlds largest bullfrog. Sang Jeremiah was a bullfrog, thwarted a bear attack on the way down to the dock at one in the morning for star gazing and saw some shooting stars.
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
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9 comments:
You have the craziest vacations EVER!!!!!!!!! Hope all ends up ok.
I'm sorry you girls had to go through that ordeal. I hope Saige is feeling better today. Did the doctor treat you with silliness pills?
First and foremost, Cash Cab rocks! I would totally be addicted to it if I could ever remember what time and channel it is on.
Second, you know I love to go off topic as much as anyone....but how did Saige get the lumpy bump and how was Yogi involved?
Third, I hear that covering oneself in honey and then dancing on a dock in the light of a full moon while singing Kum-Ba-Yah will definitely attract the bears. Or was that bees.
Please return the stretchers, wheelchairs and Ahhh Sticks (that is a medical term). I don't care if you want to have races on the rocks and I don't think building a replica of Yogi Bear out of Ahhh Sticks is a good way to attract honey bears to your traps.
We can't find Snow White. Is that a woodchipper in the yard?
Please do not try these tricks at home.
When are you going back to Pennsyltucky? Are you there yet? Are you there yet? Are you there yet? Are you there yet?
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What is that midget doing by the wood chipper with Petey's shoes?
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