Monday, June 1, 2009

Are You Smarter Than A Fourth Grader?

Not mine, Baby!

A while back my dear friend Lorena Milan was over trying to teach the Mickster how to do something. I'm not sure what. She just did a lot of clucking and yelling at him. Apparently there is some famous dog guy on tv who uses the same tactics. The result of the dog training lesson ended in no actual learning for my precious little angel Mickey but my friend Ashley who was here did hurt a lung by laughing to hard.

Last night Lorena and Ashley returned to the scene of the crime. Lorena is a fabulous cook. She can whip stuff up out of nothing. (I feel like I should give her some props before I make fun of her, I do love her, she is just another friend on the long list I have that could be considered a 'character') so anyway, Lorena starts whipping up a delicious dinner while Ashley and I wander about and try to make ourselves appear busy.

We sit down outside to eat with the kids and of course my big German Shepherd starts nosing around the table. She is quite rude. I tell her to beat it as I throw some food out in the yard which apparently is not how the dog whisperer does it. Hey guess what? I'm not the dog whisper and I also was just trying to follow the path of least resistance yesterday. I think Lucy could tell. She had me at, 'sniff, big eyes'. Lorena yelled at me, "That's not how you do it!"
Ashley started laughing.
Here we go again...

This time fortunately she did not try to train them instead she started talking about how she had pit bulls when she was younger. Let me just say, I have nothing against pit bulls. I do however feel like the name elicits some sort of racial type prejudice just because of their reputation. Pit bull owners must know this, as sweet as there little angelic jaw clamping dogs are, there is prejudice. JUST like I get with my shepherd.

What followed that was an argument between Lorena and my ten year old son as to which was the stronger dog, the PB or the GS. I chimed in with the GS was the smarter dog. "Not smarter than a Poodle!" Lorena yelled at me. "I wasn't talking about Poodles, I was talking about Pit bulls. Pay attention."
Chase did not like how this was going at all. He wanted the Shepherd to be the smartest dog. Lorena just couldn't let it go though, she kept saying, "I'm right, right?" We wouldn't agree. She is giving stories to back up her claims. Chase cut her off. "I really think it has to do with how they were brought up Lorena," he says. "If a dog was brought up in my house with my Mom who treats them like babies and another dog was brought up fighting to the death in rings, of course they know how to fight better. I think either dog could win in that way."

Um, Lorena, Chase just got you with nature vs. nurture. I know what a bible beater you are (not that there is anything wrong with that, i love you) did you want to argue evolution vs. creationism with him next?


Christy said...

No, MY dog is stronger...and she weighs more! Lol

So, what did she make for dinner?? :)

Lula! said...

I love that Chase is so wise beyond his years.

And Pit Bulls and German Shepherds scare me...but only cause I'm a fraidy at when it comes to dogs. Even Poodles.

My cat could take all of 'em, though. Seriously.

Wow, that was awkward said...

Interestingly, my kid was teaching me about how his worm turned into a beetle. I'm not sure I'm smarter than a kindergartener.

Kathy said...

Okay, I was going to say that my dog can't compete at any level. But actually, I think that she is an example that fully supports Chase's argument. She was an SPCA rescued dog (about 2 years). Very sad situation but then she became our beloved Mangy Mutt. (Seriously, she's a mutt and she had mange.) The change in her nature due to a change in her nurturing is unbelievable. Chase - you are a very smart fourth grader

P.S. Had a poodle growing up. Yup, they are the smartest. Or maybe it was just another example of excellent nurturing.....Hmmm...

Sue Jacquette said...

Oh Lorena! Why are we calling her that, btw? I'm going fb that question to her now....