Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Picking Little Blue Balls in the Bush By Bar Harbor and A Big Black Bear in A Bark Bungalow

I'm so addicted to... all the things you do... when you are playing the alphabet game.

So today we went to Acadia National Park. I'm a total park girl. At least that's what Twist says when she is hurling shoes at my camera.

Have I mentioned that she is a home schooler?

So we took a fun hike where she insisted that I walk on a broken tree way out over the water and perform tricks. Of course I did, because that's what I do. She is a teacher. I should listen.

We spent some time there. After Kirsten addressed all the water fowl in the pond and thanked them for listening to her good word we sat down to lunch at the park where Chase did order a lobster by the way. Our waiter whose name was either Kyle, Michael or Scott was very kind. As he walked away the first time, Kirsten said, "I'm thinking theater major."
The day was off to a good start!

We then winded our way up to the top of Cadillac Mountain where there were tricks to be done and blueberries to be picked. Kirsten and I spent some time performing a Cirque de Soleil skit on a boulder while our children ran wild around the mountain. They were picking blueberries. They were off in pairs scarfing up sweet wild blueberries while another group of children came down by us. Kirsten and I were sitting watching the kids when we heard a little tune...
"We are picking little blue balls in the bush by bar harbor! -W are - on -the -top -of the mountainnnnn. We pick them to eat-for -dinner. They are red and blue and green and white- we can't eat them right away..." This went on and on by a very clever little girl. She had some lyrics going. Her sister was doing the mixxing the lps on the turntable near by.

After a little bit a man came by with a container for the girls to put the stolen berries. Kirsten, who is so very clever, quite like Nancy Drew, deduced that this was the father of the little singers. In her very kind way she said to the man, "Are they your girls?" He wanted to ignore us. He made himself turn around and give us a short nod as he said, "Yes." Kirsten, not detered by his shortness said, "We have really been enjoying listening to them singing." He barely nodded at us. This is when she turned into Twist. She looked at me and said, "Yeah, he probably can't stand it. On the car ride here he was losing his mind, (she started imitating him) " Jesus! Shut the f*&k up! You haven't stopped singing since Nevada. Can I get five minutes of peace in this car you little bastards!" Um hmm. Um hmm. Um hmm.

We rounded up our people and headed home. On the way in a lot of traffic I see her turn signal go on, I look to the left and a big huge sign says, ' Church of the Savior- Jehovah's Witness's.'
"What's so funny Mom?" my kids ask.
"Kirsten is insane, that's all."
"Oh, okay," they granted me way to easily.

Later at home Kirsten was collecting kindling for a camp fire.
"Dude! Come here. I need you to see something," she says to me.
"What?" I was very busy with my blueberry mojito.
"You need to see this!" she insisted.

I walk over and she points to the woods. "What is that?" she asks me as she points to something that looks strangely like a skull. To the left was an odd little make shift den with some empty bottles inside. "What do you think lives in there?" she asks.
"A bear! Let's leave it some honey tonight!" I say. I just love bears. They are so cute and cuddly.
"That's not a good idea," she says.
"I think it is," I say.

So we have a plan. Tomorrow we are going to go to Home Depot and get some blue chalk and white paper. We are going to leave some cat food in the middle of it and see if we can find the paw prints. We are going to have the children take turns during the night on shift work. They might as well earn their keep. Lazy bastards.


Kathy said...

Go with birdseed. Bears like it. They will climb on your deck, roll your bird feeder around and then go nose to nose with your dog (okay, a sliding glass door may have been between them). Birdseed or a picnic basket.

heather said...

twist looks like she's flipping you the bird in that picture of her and saige. Nice!

twist said...

Peeepul, where are you? Don't be afraid. I'm being portrayed as far more crazy than I actually am. Plus, I'm all the way up in Maine...no harm will come to you. Yet.