Okay, I didn't write this. Anonymous did. They thought up a whole list of things that never crossed my mind to be happy about in winter. I had to slap myself on the forehead and say, "Stupid, stupid, stupid," because honestly, how could I have missed those? They are so obvious they almost bit me on the butt.
Anonymous Top Ten WInter Delights
1. Bumper skitchin'.
2. Bangin' deer. (Can I come over?)
3. Freezer full of venison.
4. Ice fishin' when the fish're so hungry they'll get after a rubberband on a safety pin.
5. Peein' Buster's name in the snow.
6. Bangin' bear.
7. Usin' the Johnny-in-the-corner instead of makin' the trek to the outhouse.
8. Rabbit-lined underwear.
9. Gettin' the little turd nextdoor to stick his tongue to the mailbox.
10. Jackoffing - that's a little Jackie D in the mornin' coffee October-March...makes the rest of the day seem much warmer ;).
Because my friends are twisted. I think I should pour myself a glass of boxed wine and toast you! Or perhaps, better yet, do a handstand in your honor. Wink wink.