## Thursday, November 6, 2008

### I'm Not As Stupid As I Thought

There are many times my fifth grader brings homework in and starts talking about it and I stare at her stupidly. I admit it, in many things, I am not smarter than a fifth grader. I don't know different kinds of soil. I can't for the life of me tell you the exact order of every species in the food chain. Really isn't it just, Man then Lion then everything else? And I do know that the lion is really the head of the whole food chain (them and those pesky sharks) because they can eat us any day of the week. So in reality, if you don't count weapons, we're kind of low on the food chain. Couldn't one of those tiny poisonous frogs sting us then a snake eat us? Maybe that is in the text books and I just don't know it. Anyway, tonight Saige wanted to understand percentages. Ask any of my friends, this is one of my special gifts. I am good with numbers. I can figure it out in my head in seconds. Nothing fancy like Algebra or Trig, but simple multiplication, division, percentages, they come very quickly to me. Saige, is not that confident in math. She is a wiz at researching something, doing a project, more creative thinking. Chase, strangely enough, is good at math. It's something with a definite answer. If you can memorize, you can do it. Although by degree and a fair amount of talent I could be called an artist I feel more comfortable with math. If you take your time, there is always a correct answer. There aren't two ways to 50% of 100. It's always 50. Yesterday, tomorrow and a 1000 years from now. It will be 50. There is something comforting in that. Being able to figure it out. Not many things in life are that simple. Not at all. Not by a long shot. So tonight during homework time, when I not only knew how to do it, but how to explain it too, I felt great. One thing down, 1,678,985 to go. Fingers crossed.

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## 9 comments:

From here on out I am coming to you with all my math issues...because I have dyscalcula and I'm not afraid to admit to carrying a tip guide in my wallet. Even if the bill is $20 even, I will check to make sure I'm not under-tipping.

Gosh, I just admitted that in your comment section. Yeesh...can you tell how puny I've been feeling the past couple of days?

Sigh...

p.s. What's up with the title of this post? Girl--you are the least stupid person I know!

It's interesting, Amy, that you, Scott, Chris and I all have our own unique areas of intelligence, but the one area where we all score high is in math. At work, they call me Mr. Numbers because I can do math calculations more quickly than any of my colleagues. I remember being in fifth grade, in a school for advanced kids, and I was the quickest in math. But, knowing the order of the food chain? Different kinds of soil? No, not a chance, and to be honest, I don't think it's made a bit of difference in my life. Now, if we didn't know that Africa was not a country (did you hear that Sarah Palin thought it was?), then we'd be in real trouble, but otherwise, I think we're doing ok.

My kids passed me in math in the second grade. It truly hurts my head to try to recall a math fact. Other than percentages~ and this is due to good old sales. I can calculate a sales price lickety split.

Are you psychic? You just scored a bullseye on my life yesterday.

Here it is: 6th grade math homework on Tuesday. Word Problems. I explain it to her. Diagram it for her. She goes to school and the teacher tells her that it is wrong!!!! Okay, I am so convinced that I am right that I emailed the teacher for another copy of the homework to try again. Pathetic, but true. (I am sending in my diagrams this time.)

I always excelled in math, too, but not the memorization of math facts or the quick calculations... Not at all, I have always been good at word problems, algebra, trig, calculus... the logic problems. Jade, by the way, is exactly like me in that regard. She loves it and it just comes naturally to her, but she struggled with math facts. Sorry, Jade!

If my husband isn't around, can I have my kids call you for help with their homework b/c I suck at math! I can kick ass helping then study for spelling or writing an essay, but whenever my 6th grader asks me ANYTHING about her math HW, I just stare back at her like I don't speak english.

Is that all? Gosh. Is that all that's left in just your life? Can I use that # and count down as well. Hmmm. I would count everything I did. I'd be done in no time. Then, can we just play? I'm just sayin.....

It sounds so simple.

Email me the homework. I'll give you the answers. Job done.

Fourth Grade Teacher.

Big Mouse

Uggg, numbers. I'll help your kids with the other stuff, you help my kids with numbers!

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