Sunday, March 8, 2009

The Fireplace, the Demon and the Almost Prom Date

Here we are again with someone else's story. All I'm saying is if "someone else" would write a blog I wouldn't have to share her stories. But since she is way to busy non schooling or pre schooling or not schooling or what ever it is she does around the compound it has become my plight to share her word. I am nothing if not a faithful consort.

So she lives in what is we refer to with (let me hear you say it) great love in our heart as "the money pit," it would take way more than one blog post to describe the craziness that has gone on in her house but suffice it to say, there has had to be all sorts of rituals to rid it of bad spirits. She spends an inordinate amount of time spitting at the fireplace apparently, but that's neither here nor there.

Well, maybe a little. Speaking of the fireplace (remember when we didn't know what a fireplace was Twist?) the fireplace was the home to two stone demons. Not gargoyles. I know what a gargoyle is. These were demons, complete with horns. No one wants that in their sitting area. I think that's why she likes to spit at them. When the spitting got old she decided to call in someone to remove them. She obviously didn't trust me and a sledgehammer. So in comes "Mason guy." Now he has done work for them in the past. He is a character. Some shin length overalls covered in blood. Is that right? Some crazy hair and other oddities. But nice as nice can be.

After day one of "Operation Beelzebub Removal," she is taking a much needed nap. While lying there something flashes through her head. It is Mason guy inviting her to the prom many many years ago. Until this time she has completely blocked that had ever happened. Somewhat confused she calls her Mom to try to drum up the memory. Mommy says, "Oh honey. That did happen. We didn't let you go. You didn't even know that boy." Then other little memories start to creep in. One disturbing one of a picture being passed around school, of this maybe prom date in the outfit he was born in, wearing only a sock, and not on his foot either. A la Red Hot Chili Peppers, but way before they donned that look. Copycats.

The plot thickens as she realizes that she taught his child in school years ago. How many times have their paths crossed? She is still not sure it's him. I push her to ask him. The next day he comes to de-demonize the living room she asks him about the dance invitation from long ago. "Maybe," he says. What was your last name? She tells him, "Spiderwitch." He thinks for a while and says, "There's a big possibility. I certainly could of." That's good enough for me. It's totally him.

I'm just wondering what his real purpose is. I really believe everyone comes in and sometimes out of our lives for a reason. If you let people in they will teach what you need to learn. Sometimes the lesson is hard. Sometimes wonderful. Sometimes it's so easy to understand what it is. Sometimes it takes a while. Sometimes it breaks your heart in a million little pieces. Sometimes it makes you feel like you can hardly breathe without them.

I guess only time will tell, right baby?


Lula! said...

Please write a book...because you are brilliantly hilarious.

I'm sorry, but the "copycats" line about the picture a la Red Hot Chili Peppers? GENIUS. You are genius.

Kathy S. said...

Okay, next lunch has to be at Twist's!

Sue Jacquette said...

Here, here, Kathy. Next liquid lunch at Twist's house where we'll sit by her de-demonized fireplace while she tells stories. I love it.

twist said...

Oh, I love this! I was so sick yesterday, I probably would have coughed myself to death laughing! You all come over and sit in front of my no-longer-possessed fireplace anytime you want. This house needs some strong, good-time, female energy and we could work on why this crazy mason keeps crossing my path - you're right, there has to be a reason. And hey, if anyone wants to check out the little devils...