Thursday, March 12, 2009

He Ain't Heavy...

He's my brother. :)

First of all, don't friggin' bicker with me in your comment, Brother That Looks A Slight Bit Younger Than You Are! And speaking of brothers, where is my other one that reads this? Off at Sue's blog commenting? Making time with my smart pretty friend's blog? The least you two could do is encourage me! Compliment me! Tell me how you love me! All my life, poor poor Amy, trying to make her brothers happy. What do I get in return? Lip. It's a sin. Against the Sun. Read on.

I mean for Goddsake my friend thinks I should be the next Nobel Laurete (obviously a brilliant, beautiful, rock star of yoga) friend! My other friend, Lora nominated me for a blog prize. BTW, you should check hers out. She's funny. Wrote a whole religious post about Jesus that just gave me a chuckle. Isn't that what religion is supposed to do? I could be wrong (it's what Mickey told me). Although I consider myself quite Spiritual I have decided until the weather breaks the only thing I will be worshipping is the Sun. And then once the sun is shining I'm gonna worship it for a while after, just so it knows I'm serious. Nothing like a slack jawed half assed worshiping session to piss off those Higher Powers. You know what I mean? Okay, wait, what was I saying? Something about brothers...

Brothers? Can't live with 'em. Can't kill 'em. Oh wait, I think that's men. But men are brothers! All brothers are men. Unless of course they had some sort of operation, but honestly if they went to the trouble to do that, they'd be on our side already. No need to kill our own.
I have severely veered off course here. All I meant to say was how much I love my brothers. More than ten sisters if I had them. More than the Sun and the Moon. Wait, not the Sun! That is currently my God. But definitely more than the Moon! Kind of. Wink WInk.


Sue Jacquette said...

You're going to join my religion? You know I've been a sun worshiper for my whole life. It requires utter faith in our god instead of science when it comes to prematurely aging skin, but hey, isn't that what religion is all about? Our high holiday is the summer solstice and our version of the Vatican is a uber-yacht party boat that follows the noon sun around the world and serves pineapple mojitos. Like the burkha of the muslim women, our women are required to wear bikinis to show their devotion to Ra. Oh, and we are baptized in chlorinated pools by superhot lifeguards.

Amy said...

Baby, like only Russell from Almost Famous can say, "YES!" You had me at "yacht" but brought me home at superhot lifeguards. I'm willing to bet my life on the fact that my brother Mark is in too!

Mark said...

Your brother, Mark, is too damn old to be worshiping the sun, or any hot lifeguards, for that matter. Then again, maybe after a few pineapple martinis, I'd be willing to throw caution to the wind. I'm not sure, though. I'm sort of embracing my middle age years, rather than going into denial and doing the things that middle age men in crisis do. Watching American Idol, reading a good book, or maybe going to a movie... that's about my speed these days.

blackbelt said...

You ARE crazy, in a cool way! ;-)

Brother Chris said...

Since the intention of this theme (finally) was to focus on Amy's most important attribute - her Brothers - let me try to satisfy her craving for attention from us by rolling all my week's comments into one rambling tome, dedicated to my dear, beloved Sister.

I'm already of the conclusion that the CBTCK bloggers should forget the Standard Time/Daylight Savings Time argument and just use Amy's blog posts to set their body clocks by. This will keep everyone guessing. Each post (in the normal world) would indicate a 24 hour cycle. However, here, there is no real rhyme or reason. Billy the Cat Guy seemed to live forever, it was the never-ending day. I tuned back in for Comment# 17 with someone suggesting a Guiness "most commented on" record chase. I made my entry and about the second I hit "publish your comment" there was a new post - so much for the Guiness book on that one. Then the Ashley's grandmother blog, which I had a bit of fun with, was a new day. I spent some shower time thinking up all kinds of crazy cigarette-related names for make believe siblings for ASHley (like NICo and TARa) only to find the minute I published them that I must have dozed off because it was a new day again on CBCTK - I seem to always publish mine at the proverbial 'ten til midnight' in the Amy time warp/blog world. Next, I was fully loaded for some fun with the woman whose fireplace irons are apparently the Gates of Hell but just when I had fully-marinated my thoughts and was ready to begin typing, voila, it was a new day again - did I nod off? How does my sister determine when the old day should end and a new one begin? It's hard to keep up, some of Amy's "days" (read blog posts) seem to last 10 minutes, and others (like these endless Speedo clad beach gods and abuse of alcohol themes) seem to go on forever, I feel like I'm serving time in one of Sue's jails.

So sis, here's an idea, forget your wild 'turn the clock ahead one minute at a time, and screw the stupid people' rants, and use your blog as the clock for all of us. You get to decide when the old day ends, and the new one begins. A little bit of consisency would be welcome by your Big Bros, but hey, it's your rodeo so you decide. I'm just fearful with the length of this comment that when I hit the "Go" button that it won't be Friday anymore in Amyblogville, I'll be commenting on her next post because she tipped the wine box one too many times last night and thought it was a new day and time to start typing again.

Love you dear Sister (and you too Markus).

Amy said...

Just so you know, it's going to be Friday over hear at CBTCK for a while. I tend to slack off on the weekend, unless something really important happens, like Lucy puts a dead rat in my family room. That would warrant a blog post.
I'm still curious what you had to say about Kirsten's demons. I still read and enjoy the comments even if my mind has wandered elsewhere.
Love you too.

Kathy S. (AKA #17) said...

I feel a song coming on.....But it will have to wait until this afternoon, or Sunday, which ever comes first .....

And is Mark's cat still part of the cast?

Amy said...

Oh Kathy, funny you should mention that cat. There has been a conclusion to the never ending story. I almost refused to put it up because I would appear heartless, well, that and it just almost jumps the tracks of the crazy train. But perhaps, since you asked...
I like songs and poems btw.

Brother Chris said...

If this is the best you can do as a follow-up to my never-ending post then your mind must be a wanderin' right now. Get a strong cup of Starbucks and try again. BTW, where the %$#@ is Jen?

The Family Julz said...

I'm pretty sure (and I guess I'm betting my soul on this) that there's fine print in the bible somewhere that says it is ABSOLUTELY FINE to worship the Sun. I sure as hell do.

I want a brother. :(
You'd better appreciate them!!!! (with 3 extra exclamation points!)

jami~ said...

amy, if you ever stop writing this blog, i will have serious withdrawl. so please keep your junkie friend hooked up. love ya. word.

ps~ i want in on sue's worship.

Lora said...

thanks for linking to me, I'm especially glad because I found Julia's blog and I'm totally hooked. Guess who will be reading blog archives instead of case histories today?!?!?!

You're nuts too, btw, and I love it more than anything.
I totally am a sun worshipper too, I feel like as long as I keep sunscreen on my face I'm good. Too bad I'm going to look like Magda by the time I'm 50!

Kathy S. said...

the tune:

“In Constant Sorrow”
Sung by The Soggy Bottom Boys
From: O Brother, Where Art Thou?

(Chorus) He is my brother, O come what may

He is a man, he is my brother
We’ve been trouble all my day
He bid farewell to ol’ Pennsyl-tucky
The place where we was born and raised

(Chorus) The place where they was born and raised

For too many years, my mind has wandered
As my brothers know too well
For in this world, I’m bound to ramble
No telling what I’ll blog about

(Chorus) No telling what she’ll blog about

Mickey and that wolf Lucy
How ‘bout some road kill, or a yoga trick
Grandma Vicki’s smokin’, Kid Rock’s tokin,
And of course, demons from hell

(Chorus) And of course, demons from hell

Even you my dear boys, my dear brothers
Become the fodder for my wit
This song I did write ‘twas for my brothers
But somehow, it’s now about me.

(Chorus) ‘Bout Amy, as it should be.

Mark said...

Christopher, dear brother, you unwittingly identified the error of your ways in being the last one in the pool while the rest are drying off... you put THOUGHT into your responses. The rest of us just go with whatever comes to mind first after reading one of Amy's blog posts. I guarantee you that's how Amy comes up with her posts... something momentarily strikes her fancy and like a runaway train, her fingers hit the keyboard and, presto-chango, instant craziness is set loose upon us. It's as if Amy knows the secret of unleashing the cool crazy in all of us because the second we finish reading one of her posts, our own craziness is unleashed and we post whatever comes to mind. It's like a feeding frenzy of craziness until Amy stumbles upon some other inspiration. You have to hand it to her... she runs a fairly good looney bin here, and I write that with all the love, admiration and appreciation I have. Who doesn't want instant relief from all of the seriousness in life, particulary when things on the outside world are so crazy, and NOT the cool kind. To be fair, Amy often posts meaningful, thoughtful, uplifting posts, but I have noticed that these get a smattering, not a flurry, of responses. Which I totally get. It's important every now and then to remember to be positive about life, to love thy neighbor, etc, but it's a lot more fun to talk trash and sass.

Love you little bro. Love you too little sis, too. How do we get the oldest sibling to chime in once in a while?

Christy said...

Oh man, "reel it in" for sure! You crack me up! I'm with you on the sun--maybe if enough of us start worshipping it, we'll see a little more of it!